Nursing, teaching, or counseling.. UGH. I want to help people. I want to make a difference. I just don’t know which I’d be best at, or which I’d enjoy most. It’s driving me insane.
Everyone keeps saying “Relax, you don’t have to know now.” But they have NO idea how much it eats away at me. I’m not the kind of person who can settle with not knowing. I have to have a plan of action. Going into school with an undeclared major is literally going to drive me insane.
I think that’s what I’m going to have to do, as much as it pains the controlling personality within me.. I just wish I had some kind of direction, some kind of certainty, some kind of plan. I hate not having at least an inkling of what to expect. I hate not knowing who I am or what I want to do. The more I contemplate what I want to do in life, the more I contemplate what I want entirely, and who I am, and what I love. It’s insanity, and it’s driving me absolutely bonkers.
I don’t HAVE to know who I am or what I believe, hell, I’ll probably never have myself entirely figured out. But the fact that I’m graduating and starting this new beginning, has me questioning every single detail about myself and where I’m going in life. It has me wondering things I thought I knew about myself without a doubt for years. I don’t know what to do.
So much stress. It’s not even necessary stress. These aren’t things I have to know right here and now, and yet it’s driving me crazy. To go from knowing who you are to questioning everything you’ve ever been or ever will be, it’s intense, and it’s frightening beyond belief.
I wish I didn’t over-think and over-analyze everything. This life would be a lot easier if I could go with things on a whim.
with shitty fucking memes or stupid fucking photos of you making dumbass faces tagged with Down Syndrome, you are a giant piece of shit and if there is a hell, I hope you rot in it.
People with DS are so beautiful and so smart. For you to be so disgustingly ignorant and vile is shameful and I truly hope karma kicks your fucking ass.